What does it mean to be a Karen?

Matty Gray (@_MettyG)

A Karen - a meme used to describe a middle class woman who kicks up unnecessary fuss and 'demands to speak to the manager'. The infamous name has an association with being racist and is commonly used to classify an 'over entitled' white woman. It's certainly a phrase that is pissing off 'nice Karens'.

Being a Karen isn't a new concept though. I, for one, have come across many Karens during my years in hospitality. As a young, 16-year-old girl I was regularly faced with 'top-class' Karens. The type of Karen who asks for the manager when she's been waiting 20 minutes for her food, yet I already told her there is a half an hour wait when I took the order. The 'pinnacle' of the Karens who whip out their debit card receipt to inform me of the exact time I took her order and questions why they hadn't received their food before the table next to her, "who had ordered after them". I would religiously saunter into the kitchen and say "OK KAREN".

To me, a Karen always meant a difficult woman, frequently white, who was ignorant because they felt they were more entitled than everyone else. Today, the definition has a much deeper meaning.

A Karen is defined on Urban Dictionary as "the stereotypical name associated with rude, obnoxious and insufferable middle aged white women." There is even a wikipedia page dedicated to the pejorative term 'Karen'.

A stereotypical 'Karen' allegedly uses their 'white privilege' to feel more entitled within society. It gets very confusing as you can have different subcategories of Karens, all of which descended from the 'soccer mom.' No, I didn't know this was a thing either. A soccer mom is defined as "a white middle or upper-middle class woman in her mid-20's to mid-40's". They commonly have kids named: Zachary, Tyler, Kaitlin, Hannah, Hailey, or Dylan and a husband who is "rather bland". Ooft, what a bad time to be a Karen. An alleged racist, a moaning Myrtle and your fella is boring. Damn.

Where do you draw the line? My friend's mum is called Karen and she calls her out for 'being a Karen' for things like taking a toaster back to the supermarket to complain it doesn't toast both sides, three months after buying it. She'd say, "Oh you're such a Karen", something that seems to be a common phrase when people act in a 'Karen' type way.

On the other hand, you can have an 'extra Karen', such as American, Amy Cooper. Earlier this year, black birdwatcher, Christian Cooper (no relation) asked Ms Cooper to put her dog back on its leash in a leash-only area of Central Park in New York. She responded by calling emergency services saying, and I quote, "there's an African-American man threatening my life". Amy Copper was dubbed 'Central Park Karen' on social media, and rightly so if I'm being perfectly honest. Ms Cooper was being a massive Karen.

However, you can't really say a Karen who takes a toaster back to a supermarket comes under the same category as a racist. I feel like the Karen saga has got slightly out of hand. What started out as a meme has now evolved into a name with a racist assumption. That's not exactly fair on the 'nice Karens' is it?

A group of Karen's went on Good Morning Britain to discuss their upset over the name shaming. I know what you're thinking, yes this is classic Karen behaviour. There is now a support group for Karens and a petition to abort the use of the name Karen as a derogatory term. It's quite ridiculous how out of hand this has got. I can't tell whether the Karens have just become sensitive and are taking this to heart, because when I meet a Karen, I don't think instant racist. Does a Karen sit awake at night thinking about the connotations of their name? What happened to the Karen with an asymmetrical bob, who just complained in restaurants and shops?

The meme actually derives from black American internet culture as a way of finding humour in a world of racial inequality. I guess the roots of the Karen meme always had racial undertones.

So what is the actual definition of a Karen now? I don't quite know, but I have decided that if somebody is being racist, regardless of their name, they should be referred to as racist. I quite like Forbes contributor Seth Cohen's description of these kinds of people, they aren't Karens, they are "unashamed exploiters of white entitlement." Maybe a Karen is just a lass that kicks up a fuss in a restaurant for no apparent reason and demands to see the manager. Everyone knows a Karen like that and if a Karen takes offence to it, then they should probably stop acting so much like a Karen.